Thursday, July 7, 2011

My Quest

This is my quest.  I want to become anorexic or at least close to it.  I want to be that thin and have the will power to go there.  I don't want to die from it but I think I would not ever get that thin.  I just no longer want my weight to define me.  This is a HUGE quest but I think for the first time in my life I am really at that point where I WANT to lose the weight, FOR ME not for a man or for someone else but for myself.  I want to be in control of something that I am completely responsible for.  Only I can choose what I eat and how I exercise.

After each baby I gained 20 pounds.  I have had 10 kids so there you go.  I am 5' 10" and my highest weight was 308.  I have lost 12 pounds in a month and that is not good enough.  I have a goal.  I want to be 149 by next April 1st.  Right in time for a cruise that I have planned and put money down on.  I want to look good.  I want me to look at me.  I am not too old to have attention of men even younger men (if a 29 year old thinks I am attractive at my current weight just wait how many men will think I am hot when I am truly thin.  I am excited for my quest and i don't remember ever feeling this way.  After all this time with my kids and my depression from my dysfunctional marriage and my horrible husband.  I want to break away and become thin for me.  I am going to post some fantastic pics and info that I see on this site so it can be an inspiration..or I should say, thinspiration

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